A COVID CHRISTMAS

 

This holiday season has a depressing watered down feeling. The Christmas events I enjoyed in the past were not around this year. And the theatres remain closed! There was no getting together with friends for our holiday lunches. We are all women of a certain age and high risk.

Our governor is a Trump turd who has never had a plan to deal with the pandemic other than to ignore it same as his master who thankfully will soon be vacating the White House.

My circle of friends already small is shrinking -- unless you count Facebook friends which don't count! They should be labeled as acquaintances and most aren't even that!

I value my true friends because they're people I choose to have in my life opposed to those who've been forced upon me: relatives, in-laws, step-relatives. Most of whom I'd never gravitate to in the first place. Thankfully most in that category are out of my life for good now!

It's wonderful and welcome news that a vaccine will soon be available. But as for myself, I'm leery of taking it. I learned the hard way I'm allergic to codeine and I suffered every miserable side effect possible with Paxil. Plus I experienced withdrawal symptoms just like a junkie when I quit. I was taking both drugs under a doctor's care! So no thank you to the vaccine!

I figure if everyone else takes it, I won't need to. I'll just continue to wear a mask and social distance until the virus is gone. Even before the pandemic I was a happy hermit.

However with the new stronger strain coming out of Great Britain I may change my mind. We'll see when the vaccine becomes available.

Besides the supermarket, the only place I go these days is to the dentist. At the rate my teeth are cracking soon I'll have more crowns than natural teeth. And no, I don't munch on rocks!

The dentist asked if I chewed ice. I said I'd be alarmed if I did! Both my mother and a favorite aunt developed a craving for ice when they came down with terminal cancer. Why my teeth keep cracking remains a mystery to me!

 A friend pointed out that I've had these teeth since I was a small child and to be grateful they lasted almost 70 years. However I was told by a dentist when I was young that if I took good care of my teeth (which I do) they would last a lifetime. -- I am not ready to die at age 70.

Amongst my emails was a Christmas card from the hotel in Bangkok where I stayed in 2016, my favorite, and the one where I began and ended my tour of Thailand. It was a delight to open!

Last night on PBS I watched the Vero Beach Ballet perform Nutcracker on the Treasure Coast. It was exciting to see knowing all those talented performers were local people. And the costumes were amazing!

Like everyone else, I will heave a big sigh of relief when the pandemic ends.

 I miss wearing lipstick! It brightens up my entire face. I miss getting dressed up all fancy and meeting friends for lunch in a nice restaurant. Heck, I even miss paper towels with Christmas designs! Finding any at all has been a challenge in recent months.

Sadly, many restaurants I enjoyed will not be reopening and they will be missed. But now I'm used to savoring a lot of special meals at home that I prepare myself.

Once the Christmas tree goes up the healthy diet goes right out the window! But hey, the food is part of the holiday! However I am determined to exert some discipline and use portion control.

I don't want to end up like the 400 lb woman who went for a swim and was sexually assaulted by a herd of manatees. They mistook her for one of their own and tried to mate with her. I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP! It happened recently in Fort Pierce only minutes south of here.  

2020 will be a year to remember for all the wrong reasons. Let's hope better things are heading our way now that it's ending.

One day the virus will be gone, but I doubt life can return to the way it was, it will be a different normal.

A PLACE CALLED HOME

 

Last night I dreamt I was swimming serenely in a scenic lake among garlands of flowers floating all around me. I was on a lush exotic island in the middle of the Indian Ocean. The mise en scene felt sublime, I wish I had died in my sleep and remained there forever.

The sleeping prophet Edgar Cayce noted that careful attention should be paid to dreams. They have a significant message for us. I read this from a book titled THE PLACE WE CALL HOME by Robert J. Grant; it explores realms that await us after physical death. I bought a copy right after my father's passing.

After reading Cayce's statement I experienced a bizarre dream that night, one I still remember vividly.

In late night darkness I was standing amidst busy traffic, car lights whizzed by me on both sides. In front of me was a badly mangled wreck of a car; I wondered if it was mine but was unable to tell. Police and paramedics were there, but they ignored me.

A woman in a pick-up truck stopped. She got out and walked over to me. She claimed we had gone to school together although I didn't remember her. She said that she was taking me home to the 100 acre place on the lake. -- The place I hadn't lived since I was 9, but all of my happiest memories were there. Life took so many ugly turns and unraveled when my family moved and bought the house on the river.

The lake place no longer existed, but those 100 acres had been paradise to me and I couldn't wait to return. I began to wonder if I was dead. But if I could spend eternity there I didn't care. I was getting excited.

The woman asked did I mind if we stopped at her house. It was along the way and something needed her attention there.

I was annoyed, but said OK because after all, she was doing me a favor.

Suddenly we were driving on a cracked road into a rundown neighborhood. Every other or third street lamp was either out or flickering beneath a low-hanging fog, a most dismal depressing place. She pulled up in front of an old two-story white house with rotting wood & peeling paint that I could see clearly from my seat.

I told her I'd wait inside the truck hoping that would hurry her up. She said she'd be awhile and to come inside, again I was irritated.

Indoors everything was in much the same condition as the outside. Her furniture was worn and faded. She told me to seat myself and then she disappeared. Time dragged by, in disgust I went looking for her. I found her inside the kitchen mopping her floor. A spill, she said. I was angry now and wanted to leave immediately!

"Soon," she said trying to calm me. She led me back into the living room and switched on the television for me to watch. The TV set was an old black & white one. All the shows on the dial were from the 1950's & 60's, even the commercials were of similar vintage. And most of the stations were snowy.

Eventually she emerged from the kitchen and I rose. She motioned for me to sit back down. She needed to go across the street to a neighbor's house and she hurriedly left. I realized I was never going to leave there. Then, thankfully I awoke!

I am a believer in the afterlife as well as reincarnation, but acknowledge I could be wrong. Perhaps my flashes of a previous life under autohypnosis as a Roman soldier and my experiences involving the departed were nothing more than brain glitches.

If my current life is all there is, I'm fine with that! The thought of not knowing what I'm returning to is disturbing. Likely it will be a world decimated by over population and climate change filled with crowds of people starving. My preference is to cease to exist and be forgotten.

AH, TEMPTATION

 

Recently I almost became a mother. A new young beauty has moved into the neighborhood, an Egyptian Mau. It looks to be less than a year old. This one is light grey with the characteristic black spots but also has a black stripe down its back with a serpentine design.

This small elegant creature came to greet me one mid-morning as I went to fetch my mail. The little thing seemed starved for affection as I petted it. But after retrieving my mail it was nowhere in sight.

As I was writing away in my home office I heard a meowing. The cat was in my garage! I opened the door to release it; but instead it ran back into my house and made itself at home. I gave him/her a name, I call it Sneaky!

Sneaky started climbing up my stairs. I grabbed the cat and told it, "You need to go home!" But I wondered if it had one.

As I carried it out thru the garage it clung tightly to me as if it didn't want to leave. I placed it gently down on my driveway and told it, "Stay there".  The kitty stared up at me with sad eyes as I quickly departed and closed the door.

I refer to the cat as "IT" because I don't know the gender. My previous one was a big Tom. Once I was petting him along with my dog (a Chihuahua-Terrier mix) I had both side-by-sides on their backs. Their sex organs looked identical although the cat was male and the dog female.

I've been asking around the neighborhood as to the origin of this cat. One told me it was a stray, another claimed it had an owner somewhere around here but they knew not where.

None of my previous cats (all indoor/outdoor) were rovers; always they stayed close to the property. Of course mine were so well fed, had so many toys, comfortable places to sleep, and were showered with such loving attention that they had no desire go searching for another owner.

Often when I'm outside I see this cat from a distance. Whenever it spots me it starts heading in my direction. And I quicken my steps to get back indoors.

Years ago I would have taken it in and adopted this cat. However at this stage of my life, I can't handle the added expense. Back in 2002 it cost $100 just to set foot inside a veterinarian's office. And now I'm struggling and juggling to pay my own medical bills!

My age too is a factor. An animal could easily outlive me. Or I could suddenly end up in the hospital for lord knows how long and then be forced into a nursing facility or a retirement home. Sadly, there are too many negative variables here for me to even consider it.

THANKSGIVING AS USUAL -- HARDLY!

 

Since I get to enjoy Thanksgiving alone every year I'm not as inconvenienced by the pandemic as many others. Shortages at the grocery store are to be expected, I read. However since I buy turkey slices from the deli rather than an entire turkey this shouldn't affect me.

However if I end up cooking a pizza or plate of spaghetti for my Thanksgiving dinner that's perfectly fine, it's nothing I haven't done before and it's all good. In fact, I've embraced TV dinners for my holiday meal if that's what it took to avoid dining with family and others. But now I'm alone and free to do whatever I want.

Here it is, the day before Thanksgiving and while eating breakfast a big chunk of a back tooth came out! It seems one tooth after another is going bad! And I'm a fanatical brusher & flosser too. I shouldn't be experiencing any of this!

Anyway, the dentist office is closed until after Thanksgiving. Bad things always happen at the worst possible time, so this is no surprise.

Tomorrow, I will be chewing my holiday dinner very carefully.

For Thanksgiving breakfast it will be buttermilk biscuits with orange marmalade. I love the history behind it. There are many versions of how marmalade came to be. My favorite is the one I heard in Scotland.

During the 1700's Spanish ships used to dock in Dundee. They dumped oranges that were starting to go bad from their cargo holds. Boys would gather them up and take them home to their mothers. The mom's cut off the bad parts and preserved the good. Sons were told "More m'lad!" and thus the name Marmalade was derived. Ever since, Seville oranges are shipped to the British Isles in order to create this delicious concoction.

As to the holiday shortages I'm more concerned with the disappearance of paper goods, most of all toilet paper! Who wants to go thru that misery and desperation again! I still don't understand why panic buying was necessary the first time! Good grief, the stores remained opened all during the pandemic! Had it not been for hoarders there would have been enough of everything to go around!

I have a strong feeling the hoarding hogs are those people labeling the virus a hoax, in other words the Trump turds! The same fools who are denying climate change is real.

This November was the only in memory that I was forced to use my air-conditioner. The first two weeks were summer hot and humid!

Also I can never recall a November hurricane and there were actually THREE at one time! And one was a horrendous Cat 5! We're now into the Greek alphabet when it comes to names. Growing up, I don't remember tropical storms being given names as they are now. These were reserved only for hurricanes.

Between the weather, the pandemic, and the deranged despot in the White House refusing to go, I'm having a harder time getting into the holiday spirit this year. But I'm trying!

I am sticking to my now Thanksgiving and Christmas tradition of a new dessert and at least one new side dish that I've never tried before during my holiday meal. This year, it's a butternut squash & egg mini frittata & caramelized onion puffs along with my turkey & mashed potatoes; and for dessert a cranberry white chocolate blondie bar.

Holidays are big cheat-on-my-healthy-diet days and it will always be thus!

Sadly, with climate change, I'm liable to see year round hurricanes during my lifetime. But for now, I just want to celebrate and enjoy holidays without them, plus no future dictator in the White House!

TRUMP GO AWAY & GET LOST

 

I am sick of your fat ugly face; your lies, your boasting, your elementary school insults, your total sliminess, ignorance, and utter incompetence!  The fact that you made it into the White House at all leaves me foaming with contempt at so many of my fellow Americans!

The vote was much closer than it should have been. When I went to bed during the wee hours of Nov. 4 I felt sick! I thought you had won re-election. I strongly believe that never would you have left office and we'd have ended up with a dictator for life. And worse, you would have turned into the most horrid one during our lifetime, all the earmarks were there!

I'm not surprised you declared an early victory. Lord knows you and your ass-licking sycophants did everything possible to suppress the vote and cheat. 

Fortunately sanity prevailed! Biden won both the Electoral College and the popular vote. So get the hell out of the White House Trump and take your white trash family with you!

Afterward I watched you on TV whining about voter fraud with no evidence to back it up. You came off looking like a big cry baby, but that's exactly what you are and always were. The rest of the world is laughing at you. I know I am!

The White House should be fumigated before the Bidens move in. However the Trump stench and stain will probably linger for decades to come.

Sadly, my state (Florida) went for Trump. Neighbors on both sides of me displayed big Trump banners flying from their flag poles. I considered buying a Trump Halloween mask and sticking it atop a long stake and planting it in the middle of my yard. But worried it might get me unwanted attention from the FBI or even the police.

Thankfully on Saturday Nov. 7 Biden was officially declared President Elect! I read somewhere there should be no gloating. Well I know plenty of Trump supporters ready to gloat like a showboat had HE won! Crowds on the evening news were shown dancing jubilantly in the streets. And I was dancing right along with them in my living room!

We dodged a dictator!!!

If Trump wants a recount, give him one. It will be highly entertaining watching a sore loser lose twice.

CUT OFF

 

I wanted to scream and claw my face in frustration! Shortly after, gloom set in followed by depression. I ached for my normal life back. Everything suddenly felt strange and abnormal. My internet connection abruptly had vanished and wouldn't be back anytime soon. I'd lost all hope as to anything resembling a solution.

This happened around 9:30 AM on a Thursday. I'd just logged on a half hour before and was in the middle of a Dear Abby column when this tragedy occurred sending me into a major funk.

However I was sure it would come back, it had disappeared before and always did, but not this time.

I was on the phone with an ATT technician for what felt like hours performing all manner of maneuvers but to no avail. I needed a new modem; he said and would send one out. I told him that I was unqualified to install it. He insisted it was easy if I just read the instructions and I'd save $99. -- Seems not so long ago a visit was only $20. But I was onboard for saving money!

This should be interesting I thought, given my age, lack of technical skills, and impaired vision.

But in the meantime, I faced a miserable weekend.

What happened to me? I am someone who loves and enjoys my own company. This was so unlike me! I recall days, even weeks alone before I owned a computer and had only a handful of cable TV channels, yet I was so elated to be alone and set my own schedule, life felt like paradise on earth. -- But then, I had to go and get addicted to the internet!

I kept reminding myself that everything else was still there. Thankfully this time I didn't lose my landline or television which is rare under the circumstances, usually when one goes kaput the others follow. And I could still work offline on my latest novel, which I did and made strides there.

Without internet I was glad that I didn't cut my newspaper subscription back to Wednesday & Sunday only, which I had seriously been considering to save money. Sadly, a daily newspaper has become a luxury. However there is not a feeling to compare with spreading its pages out on the floor beneath a window and reading it there. Even well into my 80's and beyond (if I live that long) I plan on doing it that way. 

But I missed the stories online, I missed Google Search, and I missed Facebook! Also I wasn't looking forward to ferreting thru 500,000 emails when I got back online! That's a major chore, plus it's annoying! Spam doesn't catch everything.

The modem arrived sometime Saturday. I don't know exactly when, there was no knock and no one rang my bell. I discovered it in the early evening. Thank goodness some porch-pirate didn't get there first!

Sunday AM I opened the box and started reading the directions. The first thing it said was to take a photo with a cellphone of your existing modem to remember where everything goes. -- I DON'T OWN A CELLPHONE!!!

The rest of the directions may as well have been written in Mandarin Chinese.

I called ATT back and made an appointment to have a technician come out here. The earliest time I could get was Monday between 2:00 - 4:00 PM.  That's also the time I eat my lunner  (lunch & dinner combo) however I was desperate to get back online.

The ATT tech said the problem was with my computer and the modem they sent was useless. I told him to take it back with him. He replied that he couldn't, I would have to make a special trip to the UPS store.

To make a long story short, he changed the setting on my computer and told me to cross my fingers. Like a miracle everything came back, but I don't know for how long. Like me, my computer is old.

NOVEMBER THIRD

 

Okay, on one side we have the Biden & Harris team against the cult favorite. The choice should be an easy one. Trump & his gang of repuliCONS have proven beyond all doubt how unsuited for the job he is and how reprehensible they are!

Why is an impeached President allowed to install a Supreme Court Justice, or even run for reelection for that matter? Especially one threatening not to his leave office peacefully if he doesn't like the results!

It needs to be mentioned that no member of the Trump family has ever served in our nation's military. I sincerely believe old Bone Spurs called our fallen war dead suckers and losers, it's classic Trump as is denying he said it afterward.

Yes, China is responsible for the coronavirus pandemic but Trump is the one responsible for the deaths of hundreds of thousands of Americans! His statement about not wanting to send our citizens into a panic is more Trump B.S.! He was more worried about Wall Street panicking!!!

Trump supporters point to the wonderful job he's done with our economy. Even before the pandemic all I saw was higher priced everything!

And I would not trust any vaccine endorsed by Trump! It might have bleach in it.

I'll never forget his statement about that female moderator "Having blood coming out of her eyes and other places too." -- Personally, I'd like to watch blood come out of Donald Trump!

President Pussy Grabber is what I call him because that's exactly what he is! The creep has certainly made that clear.

The Trump supporters I know are college educated people who should know better, but don't! I was watching a documentary on the Holocaust and discovered that many of Hitler's most fervent supporters were highly educated as well. Many were corrupt or else became that way after being placed in positions of power. Positions holding life and death over others, in which they exulted. But many were just plain gullible.

Trump must not only lose this election, he needs to lose big time. He must be trounced and ground into the dirt!!!

Trump and his cult of despicables could win. Unfortunately this is a real possibility since cheating and lying are areas in which he excels; plus his administration consists of ass-lickers, as are his legions of fawning sycophantic followers, also there's help from Russia.

If he wins another term the United States won't have a President, but a Ruler! Should this happen, the rest of us must not be a thorn in their side but a sword!

I would have preferred the Democrats had chosen Andrew Cuomo & Elizabeth Warren instead. That team would have been unbeatable!

In 2016 they should have chosen Elizabeth as a candidate rather than Hillary! She would have verbally eviscerated Trump in the debates!

 I had to hold my nose to vote for Hillary Clinton. During the first debate she stood there looking up at him with her mouth open as if she was expecting to catch a fly. She was a terrible choice! The only worse one was Trump, and he was worse by far!

This time there is a better alternative.

If you have not voted already, be sure to do so before Nov. 3 -- unless you're voting for Trump, then go have your head examined instead!!!

ABSENTEE BUT NOT ABSENT

 

Just days ago I filled out my absentee ballot and then afterward drove directly to the Post Office to mail it. Soon I will phone the Supervisor of Elections Office to make certain it was received and counted.

Less than 20 years ago I was one of many standing in long lines to vote. 

Back in my former hometown (Sailfish Capitol of The World) in order to receive an absentee ballot one had to be physically unable to show up. Plus you were required to state why and supply dates when you would be away. That's how it used to be.

After moving to Vero Beach in 1999 my father & I both qualified for absentee ballots for the next election. Dad had suffered a stroke that left him paralyzed on one side. He was unable to use the bathroom without my help. And because I was his only caregiver I qualified as well.

Back then, a witness signature was also required. The stay-at-home mom next door (since moved) was happy to oblige.

After Dad's passing, it was back to standing in line for several elections. I was thrilled and delighted when the state of Florida changed the law regarding absentee ballots! Voting has become so easy there is absolutely no excuse not to do it!

This Presidential election is the most important one of all during my lifetime. A would be dictator now occupies the white house; a vile con artist who excels only in lies, manipulation, & dirty tricks!

And worst of all there are minions more than willing to overlook all of this because he promotes their radical right wing agenda. Wake up fools! Trump is a phony Christian and he doesn't care anymore about the unborn than I do! He's just playing you for suckers to gain power!

Our planet cannot sustain a larger surplus of people. The ones walking around breathing right now count, not the fetuses! If these hypocrites truly valued human life they would want everyone to have healthcare and also be fed and have a roof over their heads!

The only life that matters to Trump is his own! This should be obvious after President Bone Spurs was hospitalized with the hoax. That's exactly what he called it! I heard this with my own two ears as well as Trump asking Russia to help him in the 2016 election.

This walking disease has spread the virus among his circle and probably countless others due to his arrogance and carelessness. Of course many deserve it! But unfortunately they will infect many others who don't!

If Jesus came back to earth today Trump would have him thrown in prison for sedition! Trump is everything Jesus preached against! Yet all these stinking religious hypocrites worship him. They would have us living in a theocracy. And with Trump at the helm a highly corrupt one at that!

I say no way!!! Vote OUT Trump and all his ass-licking toadies!!!

REFLECTING ON A PANDEMIC SUMMER

 

I'll admit I enjoyed the isolation and quiet especially after the shortages ended. My days were spent working on my latest novel a supernatural thriller and mystery. And nearly every evening was movie night! I was able to whittle down the collection in my DVR library as well as enjoy new films.

Unfortunately lurking outside remained that invisible King Kong sized gorilla called the coronavirus. Of course I wore my armor, (flimsy though it be) of a mask plus disposable gloves every time I ventured out. Plus hand sanitizer has always been standard equipment with me.

Before long, new monsters began rising up in the Atlantic one right after another. Cristobel, Hanna, Laura, Sally, Nana and many more all deceptively friendly sounding. I think hurricanes should have names like Igor, Vampira, Adolf, Lucretia, Vlad, etc. more in character with their nature.

My porch furniture remains piled high in my garage. I never carried it back out after last year's threat. My hurricane pantry has been restocked, plus all my devices; lanterns, flash lights, & radio remain at the ready. Many of these are crank-up since batteries are hard to come by before and especially after a hurricane when there's no electricity.

But one problem persists, the same I face every season -- someone to board my house! Last year I paid an outlandish price for the job which is crazy, but I was desperate. The estimates I'm getting now are $20-$25 per window and another $20-$25 each to unboard. In 2004 I paid $40 for my entire house and that included BOTH!

I realize there's inflation but that's just obscene! This is not a home improvement project but a life & death situation. When a Category 2 or above is headed straight for you it's a dire emergency!!! Those prices are just pure gouging!!!

A neighbor told me that a number of California people are relocating to Florida due to the devastating wildfires. Geez, don't those people know about our hurricanes! And Florida has wildfires too, just not as frequent as California.

This neighbor also mentioned that the Californians were paying higher than market value for houses here. (hint hint) At least this person prefaced that statement with: "We'd hate to lose you as a neighbor," unlike a previous one.

Yes, I'm a senior citizen on a fixed income with a two-story family sized home that I want to keep as long as I can. Go ahead and demonize me! I make no apologies! My time on this planet is diminishing every single day and I chose to spend it here in the home that I love. -- That is NOT a valid reason for someone to take advantage of me when I'm over a barrel!

And welcome to pandemic autumn with plenty of hurricanes still ahead!!!

THAT WAS NOT MY LIFE!!!

 

Awhile back, to my shock, I discovered I was on a site called MY LIFE! About the only facts they got right were my age along with my car.

According to this site I am related to neighbors (both former & current) as well as that phantom called Elena Difiori who the Church of Scientology seems to think is a tenant. If I ever saw this woman I wouldn't recognize her from a hole in the dirt! Also listed as a relative is some fellow with a name I don't recognize. I have absolutely no clue as to who this person is! Geez, talk about alternative facts and false news!

One SIGNIFICANT PERSON who was conspicuously absent is my now 80 year old BROTHER! He lives in a group home in another state and we are in regular contact! It boggles my mind that a blood relation as well as a sibling was NOT listed, but total strangers I've never even met WERE!!!

I was able to get in there and correct a few things but not all, to do so I was required to pay! From what I see, this was a scam, a scumbag site that existed only to extort money! They couldn't care less if the majority of their information was incorrect.

I called the phone number listed for MY LIFE and was told to expect at least a 20 minute wait. -- If they tell you that upfront, count on the wait time being twice as long. Who has that kind of time to waste!

NEVER did I give my consent to be on this site!!! I consider it an INVASION OF MY PRIVACY!!! -- And worse it's filled with numerous and erroneous info!!!

Soon after, My Life was sending emails inviting me to view private information about my neighbors. I had absolutely zero interest!!! And if their personal info is anything like what I found on mine, most of it had to be false anyway!

These emails have dried up and I hope this site has too!

DEADLY CATS

 

I hate this time of year the season of the hurricane!!! As I look at photos of the recent devastation wrought upon Texas & Louisiana those same feelings that sickened and stressed me when Hurricane Michael struck Mexico Beach in 2018 came flooding back. These should be once in a lifetime storms or at least once in a generation and not frequent occurrences.

And now we are into the peak of the season!

I wish science would create something that would blow these monsters right back out to sea and keep them there! Hurricanes are fueled by warm waters. Thanks to climate change we can count on even more frequent and stronger ones in our future.

As a resident of a coastal Florida town I fear it's just a matter of time before it's our turn. In the recent past several Cat 3 and 4 hurricanes have skirted our coast. I've personally gone thru 6 Cat 2's in my lifetime, half of them alone. Plenty of expensive damage was done and I've seen trees uprooted during Cat 1's.

I know a Cat 4 would turn my home into rubble! And despite the whopping insurance premiums I pay, I'd never be able to rebuild my home as it stands now. If I survive, after rebuilding and with all the losses incurred, I'd be better off moving. At my age, it wouldn't be a new start, but an ending.

In only 4 months I'll be 70 years old.

My options would be some type of senior housing, possibly in a group setting. -- As to the latter, I'd rather be dead! I love living alone! I don't have to deal with anyone else's drama, nonsense, or toxicity and I've put up with way too much of that in the past!

I'd rather make a date with the Grim Reaper in my garage before I'd let it come to that. Except there would be no garage anymore!

The only good thing in that scenario is that if another major storm came it would no longer be my problem. I'd need not worry about the bother and expense getting my house boarded & unboarded. I have a two-story and no one wants the job!

The last Cat 4 that threatened (last year) cost me $600. The man wanted another $300 for unboarding. But I talked him out of it by agreeing to remain boarded until the end of the season. Living in a dark house for weeks at a time is depressing, not to mention dangerous. I'd be a cooked piece of meat if a fire broke out. And this was the second time in recent years I was forced to tolerate this. -- And to think in 2004 I paid only $40 for the same job.

The 2004 back-to-back hurricanes were a nightmare but could have been much worse! The checks I received from my insurance company were a joke! Had I no insurance at all and just banked the premiums I would have had more money to cover my expenses.

I needed a new roof, plus all the screens on my big back porch were ripped apart and the shreds blowing in the wind.

Just the spring before, I had rose bushes planted in the border along the front of my house. Hurricane Frances killed most of them and the ones she didn't, Jeanne killed striking 3 weeks later to the day.

October 1 was the end of hurricane season when I was growing up. Now it's November 30! With global warming, climate change, whatever you want to call it; I wouldn't be surprised if we see year round hurricanes in my lifetime and I am far from young.

Nowadays entering each new hurricane season I worry and wonder if it will be the one taking my home, the place I rediscovered my happiness. Would I want to survive?

Death comes in many different categories; the loss of a cherished lifestyle is one.

However as long as I'm able to remain alone and stay in control of my own life there's always a chance at happiness!

OH NO, NOT AGAIN, NOT NOW

 

Upon learning of the shut-down last spring my first thought was thank goodness my dental work was finished and out of the way! Who wants to go to a dentist during a pandemic!

Then in late June I was happily enjoying Rosemary & Olive Oil Triscuits topped with goat cheese, a taste of pure heaven. When suddenly I bit into one and yeowled in pain! I actually felt something shift in my teeth!  -- The last time I experienced a similar sensation I required a bridge and bone graft. That was only last year!

The dental department at the clinic where I usually go to get a discount based on my income remained closed. So I returned to the dentist where they sent me before. Due to the pandemic I had to sign a waiver. What was the other option? -- Dying of dental infection as many folks did back in the days of the old west!

X-rays revealed a cracked tooth plus a deteriorating filling consisting of a material no longer used by dentists. I was shown a photo. A crown was required. This time they were unable to do a bridge because the tooth was next to the one they installed just last November.

And it would be 5 weeks before I could be given a temporary one. Plus I was in pain!

In the meantime, I was instructed to chew on the other side of my face. Should the crack spread to the root I would need an implant which would be even more costly!

We are nearing the peak of hurricane season. It was forecast to be an extremely active one and it sure is! This could really mess everything up!  Boarding and unboarding my house is expensive! And that's another anxiety ridden thing I went thru just last year along with dental issues!

I'm grocery shopping less often due to both the pandemic and hurricane season. The contents of my fridge & garage freezer must be whittled down to a bare minimum. A long power outage would leave everything ruined and need to be thrown out. I've been forced to do this before and the waste is heartbreaking.  

For me, it's been easy to save money during the pandemic; all the fun places are either closed or too crowded. I thought I'd be able to save enough to go on a cruise with my friend Sue if life ever returns to normal.

Unfortunately every cent I save is going to preserve my teeth and my vision. Geez, I'm falling apart! And worse, at my age it's just the beginning!

But at least now I have a temporary crown and am no longer in pain. That's something!

BEYOND THE VEIL, BEYOND THE PALE

 

Like many, I find wearing a mask uncomfortable. After running errands I can't wait to get back inside my car and pull it off.  However I fully realize the necessity behind it. We are living amidst a pandemic, a highly contagious and dangerous virus! Not wearing a mask and taking every precaution possible is stupid. Besides, it's only a minor inconvenience and one that saves lives!

I can't comprehend these fools who insist that it infringes upon their personal freedom. They, along with Trump are the reason the virus is running rampant in this country! I remember President Bone Spurs calling the virus a hoax. -- The only hoax here is the Pussy Grabber's ability to run this country!

Had these Trump turds been around during World War II would they have refused to black out their lights using that same excuse? Anyone who did would have been thrown in jail for treason! These idiots today are a threat to public health and deserve the same treatment!

Thanks to all of you who are refusing to wear a mask the rest of us will need to do so that much longer!!!

Recently, I had to gas up my car for the first time in months. At the station I put on disposable gloves before touching the pump. I always pay cash and handed the cashier a plastic bag and instructed her to put my change in there. "I'm high risk," I told her. She replied that she understood.

I assure you I am not ready to see thru the veil and travel into the great beyond! At my age it's going to be happening soon enough!

Our state (Florida) opened way too soon! And now the kids are returning to school. Just imagine all the germs they're going to be bringing home! I feel for the teachers, why should they be risking their lives! Teaching should be one of the highest paying professions rather than one of the least!

I read constantly about teachers having to pay for school supplies out of their own pockets. Why? When I was in school students had to supply these things themselves. Each new school year we were given a list of things to buy and the parents were expected to pay. What happened, why does this now fall upon the teacher?

Lottery money was supposed to go toward the classroom. -- At least that's what they told us when the lotto was first implemented! Instead we now have school administrators raking in whopping obscene salaries. Why is no one investigating this?

Once a vaccine for the virus is discovered you can bet there will be plenty people getting rich at the expense of others, especially if the current occupant of the White House is still there. Greed thy name is TRUMP!!!

Removing him from office is a gigantic step in the right direction. It should have been done long ago.

POLITICS AS USUAL

Campaign signs are cluttering up the landscape as glad-handing and phony smiles are filling public spaces. Yup, another election year has arrived and our local so-called public servants are at it again.

But the big one is in November and it's long past time to remove the white trash from the White House! Once removed, Trump will be fighting to stay out of prison where he belongs. So naturally he's going to be resorting to every dirty, underhanded measure available and this comes naturally to him! Lying and cheating are the only areas in life he excels so we may be stuck with this turd for another four years!

This desperate despot is now trying delay the election due to the virus that he previously labeled a hoax! And worse, during this dangerous and highly contagious pandemic he's trying to abolish absentee ballots! The reason should be obvious and it has nothing to do with voter fraud which the Republicans are counting on to win.

I've been voting absentee ballot for many years now, but I'll crawl over hot lava rocks to vote out this orange ball of slime and against every Republican on the ballot if that's what it takes!

On the local level it's much the same.

I recall a friend telling me about the woman holding a high office who joined her church over by the beach during an election year. After this woman lost she never showed up there again.

Last decade at a business networking luncheon I met an attractive young woman running against her former boss bringing the boss's greed into the spotlight. Disgusted, I supported this young lady. I phoned her and she brought a campaign sign to my house which I displayed on my front lawn. I also gave her a free autographed copy of a book I'd recently published. Anyway she lost the election.

Fast forward two years, I was dating a local V.I.P. and pillar of the community. We were attending a taxpayer luncheon and who should come waltzing up wagging her hips and flashing her smile but that same young woman. She fawned all over the guy but never acknowledged me in any way as I sat beside him, not one word!

I told a friend that if this person ever ran for office again she would never get my support! In fact I'd be tempted to vote against her depending upon who was running.

Also that same election year my neighbors directly across the street, to protect their privacy I'll call them John & Mary Greenlawn held a fundraiser in their home at their expense in support of a man running for high office here in Vero Beach.

I was invited to attend and meet him, but declined because I'd already decided to vote for his opponent. The neighbor's candidate won!

Fast forward two years again, my then boyfriend the local V.I.P. introduced me to the guy. The first thing I said to him was "I live across the street from John & Mary Greenlawn," except I gave their real names! He looked blankly at me as if to say, WHO the hell are they? -- My jaw dropped. He replied only, "Nice meeting you and walked away. -- If someone threw a party for me in their home I know for sure I'd remember them!

UGH!!! I am filled with loathing.

RANDOM RAMBLING

Due to the pandemic I don't get together with friends as much these days beyond Facebook, email, & old fashioned phone calls. When technology took over life mutated and now it's mutating all over again.

Currently I'm back in lock-down mode and plan to be until this wretched virus is under control. One thing I miss about the April Covid 19 shut-down was the quiet! My phone wasn't ringing off the wall all day with unknown numbers.

Lately online I've been getting a lot of attention from the POD people; either it's persons seeking connections or offering vague sketchy jobs. I am a POD person myself although I don't ever remember joining this networking site. Perhaps it occurred during my sleep as in that science fiction flick.

While we're on the subject, the 1956 version of Invasion of the Body Snatchers with Kevin McCarthy & Dana Wynter was much scarier than the 1978 remake with Brooke Adams and Donald Sutherland despite the canine-human hybrid. -- Although that was a great touch and one I enjoyed!

Since my vision began deteriorating reading has become more of a strain. With all my eye floaters and flashes it's especially trying attempting to decipher small print. However I can still enjoy movies!

Recently I saw Once Upon a Time in Hollywood and greatly enjoyed it. Quentin Tarantino never fails to entertain and impress! He certainly did an amazing and brilliant job of capturing the atmosphere of 1969. That was the year I graduated from high school and I remember everything about it vividly!

However as with Inglorious Basterds, I wish there was a banner at the end that read: This Is How It Went Down in a Parallel Universe! -- Alternative history should be labeled as such! Otherwise this fiction is too similar to Holocaust and moon landing deniers.

Also I've been enjoying old reruns of The Big Valley. I never had the chance view it during its first run beginning in the 1960's. Apparently a family member, most likely my father preferred whatever was airing opposite.  This was back in the days before VCRs or DVRs. But now I'm hooked on this series!

I think there should be a TV movie update staring an elderly Linda Evans as an aged Audra Barkley in 1920. She would be a widow burying the last of her brothers, probably Heath. As a young woman in the 1870's, 1920 would seem quite a different reality. Similarly as a young woman in my 20's during the 1970's I find the year 2020 nothing short of bizarre!

If not for the shortages, the April lock-down would have felt like a vacation! I kept telling myself to pretend I was vacationing in the Third World. However the pandemic made me glad I decided against expatriating, although it's still not off the table. -- I'd have affordable health care and also be able to give up driving! But then, I'd also be giving up many things I enjoy here.

ICE CREAM SCREAMS OF DELIGHT

You scream, I scream, we all scream for ice cream! That was a popular saying when I was a kid.

July is here and it's National Ice Cream Month! Yippeee! And Official Ice Cream Day is the third Sunday in every July! This year it falls on July 19. THAT'S TOMORROW!!!

This will be my weekly Cheat Day as well. I plan on enjoying a chocolate-coated ice cream donut filled with Boston Cream flavor inside!

To me however, all of summer qualifies for that title. Absolutely nothing taste better when it's hot, sticky, & humid outside. And Florida summers seem to be getting longer each year. Growing up, May and October were not summer months as they are now. Not to mention we're setting records for heat during the rest of the year as well. Ice cream isn't just for Cheat Days anymore!

With fondness I recall Red Velvet ice cream summer. Red Velvet flavor was trending that year and everyone who makes ice cream was coming out with one!  Trying them all and making comparisons was delicious fun! Guess people O.D.ed on the flavor because I rarely see it anymore, which is a shame.

I knew from that first taste of premium ice cream I would have difficulty returning to the supermarket stuff which tastes like ice milk, sugar, and flavoring all whipped together! And I don't see that the premium is any more fattening.

In fact, I eat it whenever I'm trying to drop weight and it works! -- Probably because I eat less than half a pint at a time. This fills a medium sized wine goblet nicely. I don't drink alcohol and that actually does make you fat along with other unpleasant things.

One problem I have with premium ice cream are those sneaky raised bottoms to trick you into believing you're getting more than you're paying for! I'm constantly scouring my newspaper and mail for buy-one, get one-free coupons.

For my birthday last January Winn-Dixie gave me the choice of one of their blocks of store brand flavors for free. I chose Vanilla!

Vanilla is the little black dress of ice cream flavors. You can enjoy it plain or tart it up fancy all sorts of ways! Personally, I like to floozy up my vanilla. Some of my favorites include mixed nuts topped with honey or maple syrup, sometimes just lots of nuts & shredded coconut. Also it's delicious with chopped pieces of a candy bar topped with coffee flavored syrup.

Of course the above falls into the category of Cheat Day dessert and pairs well with pizza!

The New Orleans brand ice cream has a Creole Cream Cheese flavor that tastes so rich even a small amount in a goblet is delightfully fulfilling. They also make a heavenly Cafe au lait with beignets.

As much as I love chocolate I've never cared for chocolate ice cream or cake beyond the coating or frosting. Probably because the chocolate in each is so diluted it tastes blah!

Many decades ago when I was a small child, every Sunday afternoon my entire family would pack into the car for a Sunday drive. We always ended up at one particular gas station in Fort Pierce that sold Eskimo Pies for 10 cents. That dark chocolate candy coating over that vanilla was the most delicious treat to ever touch my little pre-school tongue.

Recently, I've heard there are plans in the works to change the name because it's considered insulting to the indigenous people. I don't understand this. Eskimo Pies are something wonderful and special! Name them after me, I would be proud!

Enjoy tomorrow and celebrate with ice cream!!!

MOURNING OF THE TREE

I am a tree hugger, always have been and I always will be!

The oak's limbs were thick and low, also plentiful. This tree was wide and high, a magnificent and splendorous creation of nature! One look and I longed to be child again grabbing branches and climbing all the way to the top. I could imagine seeing the neighborhood from a bird's eye view.

This particular oak tree had a magical quality about it like something you'd read in a child's storybook. I could visualize it as a major condo/business center for the many squirrels and birds in my yard; or even a hang-out for faeries in the wee hours as dawn was breaking or banshees shrieking on its branches during a hurricane.

I recall being awakened after midnight by an eerie sound. I looked out my window. It was coming from that tree. Out of curiosity I hurried downstairs and grabbed the big flashlight. I went outside and shined it up thru the branches. The sound came from an owl! I'd never seen one in person before. We made eye contact.

I told that owl to be quiet I was trying to sleep. I went back inside to bed. Miraculously it remained silent. And I've never heard it since.

I had the coolest and most beautiful tree in the neighborhood right in my front yard! Visitors were awed by it and often commented on its beauty. It certainly gave my home curb appeal.

Sadly a day came, the one destined to remain in the infamy of my memory forever. It happened on a Saturday. I was up at 5:30 AM and brought my newspaper inside. As I ferreted thru its pages my overhead light went out leaving me in darkness. In retrospect, I wonder if that was an omen.

This was last April, the start of the Covid-19 shut-down. Otherwise, I thought it would be a normal Saturday.

The oak's branches started overgrowing into street and needed trimming. I asked my yardman to do it. Around 4:30 PM while engrossed in a Lifetime movie I heard buzz saws outside. My yardman had trimmed this tree before, so I didn't worry. -- Big mistake!!!

About 45 minutes into the movie I happened to get up to look out my front window. I thought I was going to drop from a heart attack, I couldn't believe what I was seeing!!! The huge lower branches were all down!!! I shrieked and motioned for my yardman and his crew to CEASE!!! Ballistic I ran outside!!!

They looked stunned.

"I didn't tell you to take the whole tree down!" I hollered. "I only wanted it trimmed!"

My yard guy couldn't understand why I was so upset. "Grass will grow there now that those branches are gone," he told me. "You'll have a nice lawn."

Grass is ordinary and common! That tree was a beauty and a rare treasure! Not only did it give my home curb appeal it provided just the right amount of screening from my neighbors!

And now since ruined, the only way I could get that back was to hire a professional landscaper. In other words, I'm going to be out more money that I can't really afford to spend!

I thought of firing my yardman on the spot! However he has been with me for a long time now and unlike many of the previous ones did far more than just mow & go. He also raked, trimmed hedges, and fixed my sprinkler system every time it malfunctioned and also did other outside jobs.

However he didn't trim my tree, he BUTCHERED it! Think of going for a manicure and having your fingers cut off at the knuckles! The tree remains, but its magnificence and beauty are gone. Imagine Elizabeth Taylor during her height of glamour having her nose cut off along with an eye gouged out! That tree was a superstar in my life!

The following day, I called my friend Marie and cried on her shoulder. She had a similar experience and was sympathetic. Marie told me that tree trimmers and men in general don't care about aesthetics the way we do. But eventually I'll grow accustomed to the way my yard looks now.

I'll be dead first, before that happens! Even now, I can't look outside my front windows without wanting to cry. It's just more thing in life that I enjoyed, now gone forever! 

A DARK SIDE OF FACEBOOK

Facebook has many dark sides. This is just one.

By nature, I'm a private person. However my Timeline is public. This is only because I'm an independent author and it's necessary to promote my work.

Getting a page on Facebook is like buying a house on a busy city street. You have a locked iron gate out front and just behind are steps leading up to a wide open front door. Many just pass by. But there's some who pull out binoculars, lean on that gate trying to see as much as they can. And there are others who hurl their feces over the gate and into your living room. It takes awhile to remove the stain and stench.

Recently I was verbally attacked twice with barrages of profanity and insults. The first and worst was on messenger in private by someone clearly mentally unhinged. Regrettably I had accepted his friendship request only minutes earlier. Had this been politically motivated it would not have upset me as much! This attack against me was personal after I tried setting boundaries with him.

When I accept a friendship request I would never dream of rummaging thru someone's photos beyond what is currently displayed on their Timeline & news feed. Yet people think nothing of snooping thru mine! I find this creepy and stalker-like, but usually say nothing. However this one guy immediately rubbed me the wrong way. So I asked him why he found it necessarily to ferret thru my photos as he was doing! 

  

Then I was called every vile name you can imagine combined with a long list of personal insults! His language was so extremely profane and over-the-top it was not that of a stable person! The cherry on top was that after vetting me I was unworthy of him and he was unfriending me!

However to make certain he was gone permanently I BLOCKED him.

This coward didn't give his actual name. It was that of a cartoon character with whom I was unfamiliar. But that didn't detour me from filing a complaint with Facebook.  -- I don't know if they actually did anything. These days too many people can't string a simple sentence together without lacing it full of vulgarity they may just have ignored my complaint.

In the weeks that followed I noticed more comments from recently friended persons going thru both my new & old albums not visible on my Timeline. I posted I did not appreciate it and I wished people would stop doing it!

This time I was attacked with gutter language and insults right on my Timeline! Afterward, I considered deleting all my photos and thus rid myself of snooping strangers. And I still might do that! The next time my Tech guy comes over I intend to make some significant changes.

In the meantime I'm blocking so many that soon I'll have more of those than Facebook's so-called friends!

Another unhinged person whom I blocked was a woman whose friendship I accepted out of pity. She was around my age, in a wheelchair tending a sick mother and seemed desperately lonely. Shortly after I accepted her friendship request she suggested the two of us get a house and move in together. Gadzooks we were both STRANGERS!

I tried distancing myself. But nearly every day she sent long, rambling messages in private about her past, things she experienced and her philosophies, relationship with God, etc. -- I didn't know what to say, so I'd just give a thumb's up and left it at that.

She angrily complained that I was rudely dismissing her!

I told her that I didn't understand how she could be lonely with her mother around for company. She berated me for focusing on that and nothing else. Then added that she could tell I didn't have many friends and I liked it that way! -- She hit the nail on the head there! This is true!

Now I'd had it! I told her that I found her draining and it was past time we went our separate ways. I blocked her immediately afterward!

And I've blocked plenty of men who were clearly romantic scammers. Facebook extends invitations that I never would! I don't understand why they encourage messaging in private from total strangers!

These days I am more selective than ever and quick to block.

THE STALKING SHADOW

Mysteriously she appeared during the Covid-19 shut-down. I noticed her silhouette in my peripheral vision, this shadowy profile of a strange woman but always in my left eye only. It seemed like something out of a horror tale. Something Stephen King would write! Nah, NOT Stephen King -- Clive Barker! But those guys probably aren't dealing with eye issues.

Even after the shut-down ended the vision center was still booking emergencies only. So I waited. My friend Marie urged me to call. On June 1 I did. I told the clinic I didn't consider it an emergency. They disagreed! I was instructed to come in 8:45 AM the following morning.

Now I was worried, but relieved to get an AM appointment since afternoons tended to be stormy. And I have driven in blinding rain where I could see nothing but the taillights of the car in front of me. I didn't want to be in a likewise situation with dilated pupils, dark glasses, & blurry vision.

However the next morning this weather pattern had reversed, rain was coming down in buckets as I drove to the clinic. But thankfully the sky cleared for my drive home.

This was my 3rd emergency visit to the eye clinic since my cataract surgery in 2017.

I actually thought cataract surgery would end all my vision problems; instead it was just the start! The light flashes not only remain, now there's even more. Plus I've got eye floaters galore; big black ones, small brown ones, and jelly ones like small drops of Vaseline that blur my vision in places. The later are the result of posterior vitreous detachment which I have in both eyes now. My vision is similar to peering thru a glass of swamp water during a lightning storm.

After a series of tests, I was informed that this silhouette of a well-defined feminine profile was just another symptom of my posterior vitreous detachment. It could be removed by laser along with many floaters for a mere $7000. UGH!

I have more pressing expenses, many more! Nor do I have a wide enough circle of friends and acquaintances for a Go Fund Me page. Plus I don't have the type of personality most people can relate to. Since this is not serious, only annoying I'm just going to live with it. I'd rather spend that $7000 on a great trip, repairs to my home, or most likely the next big unexpected expense that raises its ugly head!

I'm just grateful this isn't more severe!

Around this time, a close friend's father was handed a death sentence from cancer and she was researching funeral homes. "Everything is so expensive I don't understand how anyone can afford to die," she told me.

From my experience you can't even afford to get sick unless you're rich! If I'm anything like my parents this is only the beginning, far more grievous and expensive maladies are on the horizon.

When MY end comes, I won't have to worry about funeral expenses, they'll be selling my body parts just to make a dent in all the medical debts I'll probably be leaving behind.

In the meantime, I'm doing everything I can to keep healthy and out of hospitals. But it may not be enough.

Since benign and not evil, I'm going to live with the witch in my left eye as I call her. But if I ever hear voices in my head that are not my own I'm going to be splashing that eye with holy water and contacting an exorcist!

FINALLY!!!

At long last the Covid-19 face masks I ordered from Amazon (April 2) have arrived! That slow boat (or plane) from Zhejiang, China has finally reached our shores. Now I can roll up my do-rag and put it back in the drawer.

I'd joked that a cure would probably be discovered first. Sadly, this is not the case. However I'm all set for the second wave. And too many fools seem determined to make that happen!

Also I ordered a big broad-brimmed hat with a huge shield attached that comes down to the chest. (I'm still waiting for that.)You can be sure it will be a regular part of my summer wardrobe every time I set foot in public.

Mostly, I plan on staying home until the virus is under control. Yes, I miss dinning out and going to movies. The theatres here remain closed.

However I'm enjoying a wide variety of films on my DVR in what I call my living room theatre. I enjoy double features on Friday night and all afternoon matinees on Saturdays.

And I do what I refer to as eating-out-at-home. Always I set a pretty table for myself with different color schemes and decorations, but now when seated I make up different names of restaurants such as: Cafe Fandango, The Hidden Garden Bistro, or The Serendipity Diner and pretend I'm eating there.

Should we be slammed by a second wave of the virus in autumn, (I hope NOT!) it will coincide with peak hurricane season. Shudder and horrors, it's forecast to be an unusually active one! A strike would be a worst case scenario!

Several years in a row we've experienced close calls with deadly Cat 4's here on the Treasure Coast. If hit, I hope my house is still standing by Thanksgiving. But even if struck by a Cat 1 my home theatre along with all my imaginary restaurants will be closed for repairs.

However when you're inside a sweltering, boarded-up house with no air-conditioning or electricity of any kind, a can of soup served at room temperature is mighty tasty.

But please, no virus!

OUT TO LUNCH, AGAIN

During the shut-down I missed dining out terribly, but at the same time felt it was too soon to resume afterward. However around the middle of May, I met a friend for lunch in a popular restaurant at the airport. I had not seen her in a long while and Sue is a cherished friend, one of a rare few whose company I actually enjoy. She was worth the risk.

We chose that particular restaurant because they had INDOOR seating along with the necessary limited capacity and distancing. I've never been a fan of outdoor dining because this is Florida; blazing sun, heat, humidity, bugs, etc.

Our lunch together was especially nice. Besides Sue's company, it felt uplifting to put on make-up, wear stylish clothes and go out someplace that's not the grocery store or bank.

Sue made the reservation almost 2 weeks in advance to avoid waiting in a long line. We'd read in the newspaper that the public was now out in droves here on the Treasure Coast. However the restaurant was almost empty. During normal times it's bustling!

But this actually worked quite well for us. We felt safer. We're both in the high risk category. Also Sue & I enjoy sitting and visiting for hours after the meal. This way, we weren't holding up a table and could hang out there as long as we wanted. We always schedule our lunches after the noon rush anyway.

Neither of us wore masks. I'm still awaiting the ones I ordered on Amazon (April 2). They must be literally coming on that proverbial slow boat from China!

However Sue gave me a valuable tip! She pulled out a sleep mask to show me how she uses it to cover the lower part of her face. (You can buy them at the Dollar Store!) I have several at home and tried this, later. They cover all the right places and fit snugly. The only problem is I find them difficult to breathe. It feels as if being suffocated by a cushion to me. My do-rag is more comfortable. But a sleep mask with do in an emergency.

If Sue wants to get together for lunch again, we will, although it must be with all the proper precautions in place.

For the most part, I'm sticking close to home until the virus is under control. I can't afford health insurance and despite my age I'm ineligible for Medicare. A hospital stay would ruin me financially! So I must take this seriously!!!

HAPPY NO-MOMMIES DAY!

My mother was like the Godfather (or Donald Trump with the ego to match) if she did anything for you she expected a ginormous favor in return, but others were too dim to get that part!

As an adult orphan and childless woman, I have commandeered Mother's Day!!! In this house it's called: NO-MOMMIES DAY! I celebrate my mother's absence, NOT being stuck with kids, and my freedom!

About half my friends have never been mothers. A dear one who is past age 60 confided that she's always felt a tinge of sadness on this day for never having been a mom.

I reminded her that it's not too late! She's a successful business woman who can easily afford to buy a kid. Lord knows there's plenty on the market! They even sell them in newspapers and on TV.  However the latter are older, just like dogs they're a harder commodity to push. Most people want their human pet young like a puppy.

There is no doubt in my mind this lady would make a great mother, but it would be at the price of her happiness. She likes to work and play hard, as well make frequent spur of the moment plans and trips. A kid would put a damper on all this. Unless of course she hired a live-in nanny and I can't picture her doing that. She loves children and even volunteers helping abused and neglected kids. As a mother, she would be hands-on. And this might make her happy, but nowhere near as happy as she is child free now. 

I'm a completely different personality type. I enjoy my quiet alone time. I actually look forward to coming home to an empty house. People noise drives me straight up the walls and kids make way too much of that!

When almost everyone was confined to their home due to the pandemic, I asked her, "Aren't you glad you don't have to put up with any whiny, screaming kids now?" And she agreed being childless was a blessing!

A few decades back, my father was friendly with a man who had 6 kids. He confessed right in front of me that he loved his children, but if he could turn back the clock, he would never had a one. "I just can't deal with all the problems they bring and it doesn't end when they turn adults," he lamented.

When I look at friends and acquaintances with children and all the problems they're forced to endure, not to mention the expense, I find myself pitying them.

I'll admit I'm not the nurturing type. Neither was my mother although she liked to pretend to be around other people.

A therapist once asked me if I felt short changed never having had a family. I told her, "Hell no! That's the one thing about my life I love the most!"

GREAT HAIR BUT I'M STUCK IN MY LAIR

Reading about all the desperate measures women are resorting to these days because salons are closed gives me a chuckle. I did that dance so many times and for so long I know it by heart. During my blonde years I was covering dark roots and as a redhead my roots were gray. Not to mention I've been every color in-between concealing roots as well.

For the most part I was a home hair-dyer. But those chemicals were strong and damaging to the hair if used too often, so putting up with roots for awhile needed to be tolerated. And I became quite creative.

I have wigs in many different styles & colors. But now there's a new trend that leaves me mystified -- wigs with dark roots! Why???? This is so stupid!!! The purpose of a wig is to conceal them, not show them off!

However this being Florida the weather is too hot and humid most of the time for wigs so I've spent months wearing hats and turbans.

Some have commented that I'm the first woman they've ever seen who looks good in a turban. I must point out this all depends on the turban! Cheap ones make everyone look ugly! Buy one from either a wig or specialty shop. Those are really stylish! And if you look attractive in a hat you'll be equally attractive in a turban.

However now that I've gone natural, life is a lot less bother.

Not too long ago my locks were slashed shorter than ever. (Shorter than in the photo!) I was sporting one of those mannish cuts I absolutely abhor. But I had to make certain all that Brazilian blow-out junk was gone! This had been an expensive mistake and disaster! The results were nothing like the stylists assured. I should have taken before & after photos and sued that salon!

However that hideous man-cut has grown out several inches and is now looking really cute! But sadly I can't treat myself to anyplace nice in pretty clothes due to the coronavirus! The irony!!! Boo hoo

I'd post a photo on Facebook except that I don't own a cellphone. I'm home 90 per cent of the time under normal circumstances so a landline works for me. Besides cellphones are too small and look as if they were made for elves. I always wonder if they're manufactured in a cave next to that hollow tree where the cookies are made.

Of course I'll need another haircut eventually and by then the salons will be swamped! But never fear if nothing else I'm resourceful!

LONG hair is easy to cut yourself, especially a blunt cut. While my hair is growing out I'll just have to resort to cover-ups. I certainly have a wide variety to choose from!

Unless anyone hasn't yet figured this out, here's how to cut longer hair yourself. First, sharpen your scissors! Do this by folding a piece of tinfoil multiple times and then cut this into shreds.

Since my hair is wavy/frizzy I need to trim it wet. This makes it easier, period.

Part your hair down the middle lining it up with your nose. Do this all the way down the back, pull both sides forward. Comb, then snip, snip on each side. -- It's easier than baking biscuits from a canister!

If you don't want a blunt cut, try this: after the initial trim, part your hair behind the ears & tie back. Pull the front forward on each side. Cut each on a slant. Then separate the back half & pin it away from your face. Now cut the remaining 2 sides on a slant as well & you are done!

However for a decent SHORT cut I recommend a stylist!

If I had to, I could get by never having to go to a salon again. But sometimes I'm just in the mood for a change. Plus really short hair is a time-saver; it requires nothing more than shampoo, mousse, and air-drying! I've come to love the convenience and its Florida friendly!

WEIRD TIMES

The Coronavirus already had gained a foothold as people were starting to get sick and die close to home. Everyone was now being urged to self isolate, sheltering in place. That AM I read my online horoscope, paraphrasing it read: "Today is the day to get out and socialize meet as many new people as you can!" I almost burst out laughing! I don't have a death wish.

I am not a believer in astrology although I took it quite seriously back in my teens during the 1960's. -- I'm a Capricorn, moon in Aquarius, Leo rising. But I came to my senses by the time I enrolled in Community College.

Who but Nostradamus could have predicted our current world pandemic? Many are swearing he did, others insist his predictions are deliberately being molded to fit the situation as jello into a goblet. Preachers do this all the time, advertisers, too. And I've done this myself at networking events to promote my books.

Still the world has gone weird! Seeing cashiers behind plexiglass shields at grocery stores plus having to stand 6 feet away from everyone seems downright bizarre. Add to that all those face masks on shoppers and life feels downright surreal. Could any of us have imagined this a year ago?

I cannot get my hands on a face mask! I'm still waiting on Amazon! However do-rags work better than scarves, they have long ties. Also I wear a small canvas hat with a brim all the way around. No longer do I put on make-up to go shopping. Between the rag and the hat no one can see my face. I may as well be wearing burqa.

And suddenly I feel self-conscious about my acid reflux cough. I worry about having a spell in the store and men in hazmat suits appearing out of nowhere dragging me away.

Plus they're enforcing safe distancing at a time I've never seen stores more crowded or shelves more empty! Senior Shopping Hour is early and this is Florida & Vero Beach, most of the citizenry here is seniors!

Ferreting thru an old purse I discovered a huge pile of napkins I'd squirreled away from various restaurants. It felt like Christmas! And I had a box of disposable plastic gloves left over from my hair-dying days. Now was their chance to shine again!

I needed to deposit a refund check and since I don't own a mobile phone (& no plans to get one) I had to stop at the bank. Attired in my hat, dark sunglasses, & do-rag worn bandit style I went in the drive thru. A few months ago this would have caused alarms to blare and police sirens in the distance heading my way! However I did see a flash of fear in the teller's eyes when she first spotted me.

Directly afterward I bought eggs, fresh fruit, & veggies at the grocery store, no T.P. but I still considered my day a success!

Traffic was similar to summer (after the tourists & snowbirds have gone home) with the exception of the mall & big shopping plaza behind the bank. They looked deserted and abandoned.

My big fear is that after the Coronavirus ends life will dramatically slide downhill never to recover. We don't exactly have the most competent or honest people running our country now. There's constant tension in the air.

But there are some bright spots. I got my Starz-Showtime package back. Of course I'm paying more than before! "You don't have anything else to spend your money on," a friend told me. That's true, my income goes mostly to frivolous things like Food, Electricity, Water, Taxes, Insurance, etc. -- But I never needed that movie package as much as now! Theatres are closed!

And then there's my friends, Rose dropped off a few rolls of toilet tissue which have become more precious than gold or diamonds. Marie left me a small blooming plant with pink flowers which I placed in my bedroom window. And that same week Sue sent me an early Easter card.

I look forward to the day when my friends and I can meet for lunch at a restaurant again. I'm hoping that wonderful day will not be far away.