GOING BATTY IN MY 50'S

Recently in the letters to the editor of our local newspaper, was one from a woman beside herself with a bat infestation. She was worried about catching histoplasmosis. No one would help her.


I could sympathize, because I experienced the same ordeal myself 5 or 6 yrs ago. It was a June I will never forget!!! I even had the same problem with the critter control company she hired. I tried phoning her, but the number had been disconnected.


It all started when I noticed squeaking and chirping in my north wall. I thought perhaps squirrels had built a nest in there. I wasn't really concerned.


Then one evening, around 10:30 PM, something the size of a bird flew past my nose! I jumped out of my chair and turned on all the lights. My gaze darted around the room! Then I spotted IT near the top of my cathedral ceiling, a bat! Immediately I opened my front door. The bat wasn't moving and mosquitos were coming inside. I closed the door. It swooped over me and came to rest high on the opposite wall.


I decided to go to bed. I'd catch it unaware during the daylight hours.


The following day, I searched everywhere. No bat! -- But the stinker had messed on my long table in the dining area. Thank goodness it was covered with a plastic tablecloth! I figured it had found its way outside the same way it got in.


Right after dark, the nuisance was soaring inside my house again! I wanted no more messes. I was determined to catch it! Eventually, it came to rest against my kitchen wall. I grabbed my giant pasta strainer and a mixing bowl. Success! It clung to the strainer as I scooped it, bowl underneath. I carried it outdoors.


I turned the strainer over. I ordered it to fly away! It remained. I looked at it closely under the outside light. It was rather cute, like a puppy. I stroked its back with my finger. Startled, it flew off!


Not long after, I noticed a strong urine smell coming from the wall. As I began examining it, I found myself dodging turds! Egads, immediately I put newspapers down. Every day I was forced to change them. -- Often avoiding turds from falling in my hair! I had a bat infestation!!!


I called the critter control company. To my horror, they informed me that nothing could be done until August. After the babies had all flown away. Bats are a protected species. By now the smell was intolerable! The critter co. could do nothing, because they did NOT do inside work. All they could do was seal the outside after the bats were gone. I pleaded with them to at least give me some phone numbers! They were unable.


I spent the entire month of June living upstairs in my bedroom with the door closed.


I phoned numerous handymen. The ones who returned my call informed me they didn't have a ladder high enough. The problem was at the top of my 30 ft cathedral ceiling.


Finally, I found one! I spent an entire Saturday waiting for him to show up. My many calls went unreturned. We shook hands when we made the appointment. Obviously a handshake means nothing anymore!


Unfortunately my kitchen is downstairs. Whenever I needed to eat, I had to spray (rather douse) my living room with Lysol while standing in my loft. As I did, the bats became vocal. They clearly were displeased! After the spray settled, I came down to cook. By the time I started washing dishes, the Lysol had worn off. It was difficult to keep my meals down.


Everyone warned me of histoplasmosis. But I inhaled so much Lysol, it probably killed the bacteria in my body.


My friend, Irene, offered to let me stay at her house until mine was habitable again. However, I consider her a good friend. I wanted it to stay that way. So I remained home.


I managed to get a bat expert to come over. He determined the type of bat by looking at the droppings. These were American brown bats because their droppings looked like lizard turds rather than guano. -- Thank goodness! He said they would be gone in July.


He asked if I wanted to see the bat in his car. I inquired if it was alive. He nodded, and brought a box inside. Holes were poked in the top. It was a Mexican fruit bat! The thing was gray and absolutely demonic looking. -- I would have never touched that one! He scolded me for touching the other. Because it might have been rabid.


One evening around dusk, my neighbors reported seeing between 50 and 100 bats flying out of the top of my house.


Eventually I found a handyman with a ladder high enough to seal the inside opening. But I was nearing the end of my ordeal by this time.


The bat expert also said my place was now their home. I needed to put up a bat house because they would be back next summer. I sent away to Ohio to get one. Then I had to pay a different handyman to put it together, and pour concrete into the ground.


He cautioned me to remove it whenever there was a storm warning, because it could become an unguided missile. The following June, the bats didn't return. And good riddance!


During a tornado scare, I pulled the thing from the ground. I almost took out a window removing it! It's about 15 ft high, and quite unwieldy to handle. I left it in my garage. If anyone in the Vero Beach area wants a free bat house, contact me.








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