HAT HAIR, BED HAIR, & DEAD HAIR

There’s an old French superstition that a hat on a bed is unlucky and brings death. If that was true, all of my friends and family would have been wiped out decades ago. I would be the most prolific serial killer in history! – A bed is the perfect place to throw your hat!

It’s a mere coincidence that everyone I knew started dropping like flies when I expanded my hat collection, I swear!

Big hats are perfect for those bad hair days during the summer. In cooler weather, I prefer wigs and I have those in a variety of colors & styles. Our Florida heat, humidity, and monsoons are all hard on the hair.

I am making big life changes, starting with my hair! I’ve let my gray grow out. Recently, all of my red hair was cut off! Now, I have a short, old hag hair cut! Unfortunately, I’ll have to tolerate it at least temporarily.

My trip to Ecuador with my friend, Rose is coming up fast. We both plan on dressing down. The look we are aiming for, to quote Rose: “Too old to rape and too poor to rob.” This will also be my look when I travel to Thailand, alone. I won’t have a lot of time to fuss with my appearance during my two big trips; otherwise I wouldn’t be caught dead in this old lady hair!

I told Rose that if in 2016, my plane crashes and my body is in viewing condition, to stick one of my blonde wigs on me for the service. She can remove it and donate it to charity before they throw me in the cremation oven, or not. I’ll let her decide.

I’ve never understood why they don’t just prop wigs on cadavers. They could go into the ground or the flames with cooler-looking hairstyles than they had while alive.

I’m currently reliving all the reasons why I hate short hair! I can live with the color, it’s more flattering than what I expected, but this cut just isn’t me.

I saw this very hairstyle in one of my history books; it was sported by Magda Goebbels, wife of Joseph Goebbels. For all of you non-history buffs, he was Hitler’s Minister of Propaganda! In her younger years, she was quite attractive. However in this photo, she just looked old.

I’ve read online that there is a new trend among young people to dye their hair gray. The big question in my mind is WHY?????? It will happen soon enough. It’s one of those things in life you don’t want to rush, like arthritis. I don’t understand why anyone would deliberately make themselves appear older, unless of course they’re applying for a Retirement Visa in another country like me.

Next, these young people will be sporting canes and psychedelic orthopedic shoes! Perhaps when I get my lip-tattooing retouched, I’ll have my legs tattooed to create crazy-cool varicose veins in neon shades of purple & blue. That in combination with my new gray tresses will make me look like one hot, happening, hip chick!

But seriously, I’ll admit this short cut is much easier to care for; I can jump straight out of bed without having to comb it and still look presentable. Also it’s far more comfortable now that the sweaty weather is here.

I need to have my photos updated for social media. I’m waiting for my tresses to grow another inch or so in the vain hope it may look better.

My red haired years belonged exclusively to Vero Beach. As I sat in the salon chair watching all those copper tresses pile up on the floor and be swept away, I began feeling depressed. That was my beautiful life here that I so loved and enjoyed. Now it was all just a memory.

Early in 1999, I arrived in Vero Beach as a blonde and I will be leaving soon with gray hair.