SCARVES, SHAWLS, BANGLES, & BALLS (etc.)

About a month ago, I stripped for the crowd at a business networking luncheon. Well, just from the neck up!

 

I can transform a pair of slacks and belt into a turban and necklace. (Yes I really am THAT amazing!) However, when I tell someone I can do this, they crack-up laughing. I wanted to prove it could be done without looking ridiculous. So I did a live demonstration. Actually this is easier to do with pants (rather than a scarf) because you have long handles to twist and tuck.

 

Also there are photos of this in my new book, LOOK LIKE A PRINCESS ON A PAUPER’S BUDGET co-authored with April Sampson. (Amazon & Kindle) These were shot by my friend Rose (with her cursed camera/phone) in a spare office with terrible lighting. But it was cheaper than going to a studio. I work within a budget!

 

At the business luncheon, I planned to introduce the book attired in a tiara and lots of bling. Fortunately, I decided to save that costume for a later time. Another speaker wore a crown. The Lice Queen! She was an attractive lady, too. Someone you would never associate with bugs in a million years. She was actually a lice eradicator, not their queen.

I love to accessorize, but I’ve never been a fan of scarves. To me, they appeared old ladyish. My step-mother was fond of them. Shawls were the hot item in my youth, I owned several. However, in recent years, shimmer, sparkles, ruffles, fringe, & bangles have all been added to scarves. Now they’ve become a lot more interesting!

Although back in the 1980’s I purchased a long Hindu style dress in a Thrift Store. I paid a seamstress to cut off the bottom third which I used as a scarf. (Scarves were trendy that year.) The seamstress cost me far more than the dress.

A favorite accessory of mine was a bracelet I purchased in a Dollar Store. A real treasure! It actually looked like an expensive piece of jewelry. It had both charms and beads, yet it was amazingly versatile. I wore it with many outfits and always received compliments.

 

One day I wore it to a Taxpayer Association Luncheon. About 10 minutes before the meeting was called to order, there was a resounding BAM, BONG, BANG, BONG, BAM, on the table before me! Beads and charms scattered everywhere, the string had broken! Every head turned to stare, my face was flushed scarlet. Thank goodness this didn’t occur when the speaker was up! The lady beside me helped to collect the pieces. “I can give you the name of a jeweler who can restring this,” she said.

I was a bit ashamed to admit the bracelet only cost a dollar. But it had served me well for 4 years.

In high school, I never attended a prom or any school dance for that matter. During my 50’s, I made up for this by attending several formal balls. My 1^st when I belonged to the Celtic Club. This was early in the last decade. I attended as part of a group.

I had just broken up with the guy who insisted on bringing his dementia-addled mother on all our dates.

To my delight, I found an elegant periwinkle gown on sale for half price at a Thrift Shop. Having it dry-cleaned cost twice what I paid for the dress. I already owned a fancy pair of shoes from ROSS.

Now I needed a silver evening bag to match. This presented more of a problem! The ones at the thrift places looked like they’d been thru a war. The consignment shops had better, but they wanted as much as the new ones at the Mall. Eventually, I bought a plain silver one at Walmart for $10 which worked out perfectly.

In my closet is a large, plastic men’s toolbox with lots of compartments. There, I keep odd earrings, pendants, brooches, beads, baubles, silk flower hair clips, chains, plus fancy ribbon & cords. Everything inside is interchangeable! I call it my magic box! Whenever I don’t have a necklace to match an outfit, I can create one! And it’s always unique.

This is why I came up with a beauty book for women on a fixed income. I wanted to show everyone you don’t have to spend tons and tons of money to put yourself together and be attractive.

It’s rather ironic that my life took this direction, because growing up I was the antithesis of a feminine little lady. I was more into bugs, spiders, and toads, etc. I kept leeches in a jar for pets. Of course I didn’t know what they were, until I brought them out to share with a friend. She started screaming!

That part of me will always be there. I caught a bat with a pasta strainer inside my house, then carried it outside and released it. Removing snakes is never a problem. I only kill them if they’re poisonous. I’m no girly-girl there! Also I can kick hornet butt with flourish. For years, I did it with just a broom and a can of Raid. – TOP THAT, LICE QUEEN!