"Where do you see yourself in ten years?" I've always detested that question! And tomorrow I turn 72 the same age as my mother when she died. Mom was a trip and memorable for all the wrong reasons.
I'm not expecting to die this year, (knock-on-wood) my mother was diagnosed with cancer at age 71 and by that time it had spread.
Never can I be sure what's going to happen tomorrow much less ten or even five years ahead.
Every time I've tried to make a plan, life would blindside me throwing everything on the floor scattered and broken like glass chess pieces. I'd pick them up, glue them back together and come up with a new plan; only to have the same exact thing happen.
So I'd buy a new chess set. And wait to see how other things play out before moving my pieces, hoping all of them would be correct, but it seemed they never were.
Actually I never learned to play chess. I wanted a set for Christmas when I was twelve. I watched kids play it at school and it looked like fun. However my mother refused, claiming I wasn't smart enough to learn anything that complicated.
I've read that our intelligence is inherited from the mother. So that doesn't say much for her!
2022 was a miserable and lousy year for a number of reasons. Also last year came many notable famous deaths as well as personal ones.
For example Queen Elisabeth of England, she was one I expected to go on forever; even long after the rest of us are gone. Unfortunately no one is immortal.
Then, came the death of versatile actress/comedienne Kirstie Alley. We were the same age and our birthday's close together. Ironically she died of colon cancer that spread, same as my mother!
One of my favorite original Dianne knock-knock jokes features Kirstie, read below:
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Kirstie Alley!
Kirstie Alley who?
Kirstie Alley cat who peed in my flower bed!
It seems less funny to me now that she's dead. Yes, I'm one of those people who chuckles at my own jokes.
2022 was also the year my remaining cousins all died. They were brothers of varying ages and I found it shocking that all passed within the same year.
The youngest, the one who always took the best care of himself died from two different kinds of cancer as well as a weak heart.
Death doesn't frighten me but other things do!
Thanks to modern healthcare our elderly live longer than nature ever intended. That's why we are now warehousing so many feeble old people!
My two older cousins were doddering dementia patients. This fate also befell my stepmother along with several dear and close friends. This is truly scary, I would prefer death!
I still recall every detail of my 25th birthday including what I ate for dinner. But nowadays I'm forced to wrack my brain to remember what I cooked the night before. And too many times I find myself standing before the wrong kitchen cabinet to retrieve something I know is in the opposite one, but it doesn't dawn on me immediately.
Equally disturbing are those evenings when I'm holding my DVR remote in my hand and I have to stop and think which button to press which I should know automatically by now.
I HOPE THESE ARE ONLY MINOR SYMPTOMS OF AGING AND NOTHING MORE!
I would never want to go on living after my mind is gone. Personally, I think dementia and Alzheimer's patients should be euthanized. This is merciful!!! I know there are people reading this who think I'm terrible for that. They seem to believe that letting these patients linger is kind. -- Actuality it's cruel!!!
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