THE $$ CAKE

 

Life is divided into cubes, chunks & slices, mine are labeled. There's the A.D. (After Dad) period, and the B.C. (Before Candlelight, our florist shop) period. Also there's the Glorious Years (my early childhood), the Hell Years which is how I remember my teens, The Agony & Exploration years (I worked at a job I hated, but also was fortunate enough to travel the world), The Great Depression following directly afterward lasting 2 decades where the highlight of my life was grocery shopping, The New Hell Years (when my father remarried), My Roaring & Exciting Red Haired Years, and now My Gray Haired Years.

Up until the 21st century was what I refer to as The Year of the Nine Finale Pattern, because every year ending in a 9 heralded a major change; either a move to a different house, a graduation, a new job, or even the end of an old one.

Now in my Gray Haired period I feel myself teetering on the verge of another Great Depression, one which I hope will not end with my death. To die happy has always been my goal!

Online during the holidays I kept seeing this marvelous, but obscenely expensive Irish Cream Espresso cake. I've had Irish coffee and frankly, I didn't like it. However I've eaten the cake version with just a hint of Irish cream flavor without the nasty alcohol taste. And it was a heavenly new level of deliciousness!

I began lusting after that cake. Every day my willpower was weakening a little more.

My 71st birthday was coming up and mother died at age 72. If death was around the corner I wanted to die having tasted that cake! Next year I might not be able to afford such an indulgence, but this year by golly I was going to have it!

The cake was $50 but I got $20 off because I was a new customer. Then, there was the $35 shipping fee. I was starting to rethink this, but decided to proceed.

It arrived in dry ice. I had to Google how to dispose of that safely. I needed gloves and tongs along with protective clothing because it burned flesh. It felt as if I was handling nuclear waste. Google suggested leaving it outside to evaporate in a sturdy container away from animals.

My neighborhood is full of cats & dogs as well as curious squirrels. So I decided to place it out in my screened-in back porch. If a few chameleons went belly-up I'd just consider it collateral damage.

After unpacking it I immediately placed it in the freezer where it will last up to six months. This way I can enjoy it longer.

The cake tasted like one you'd buy in a fancy pastry shop rather than a supermarket. It was good, but any flavor of Irish Cream or Espresso was almost nonexistent; more like the baker took a swig and breathed on it.

But it felt special and this was a birthday I really needed it!