There was an entirely different energy right after Christmas;
a sluggish moroseness filled the air. New Years have always held an element of
sadness rather than celebration for me. Plus I was suffering a bad case
of flu with a bug that wouldn't let go!
Every New Year's I can't help but think of all the people
who didn't make it that far. I've reached the age where I know more people who
are dead than alive. After I hit 50; friends, relatives, &
acquaintances seemed to drop in droves right and left! I miss my friends
Margaret & Pat to this day!
Nowadays I'm not as socially active as during the previous
decade. Most of the groups to which I belonged (or attended regularly as a
guest) have since disbanded. And the ones remaining have changed to the point
that I no longer have an interest.
Fortunately, I love and enjoy my alone time in my beautiful
home. But sadly, my holiday vacation from real life is over, now. The new year
always brings new problems along with old ones and they always seem to be
expensive. I don't need a crystal ball to see several that are already headed
my way!
Add to this, I am furious that the price of postage is going
up this month! That means the cost of everything shoots up! Why don't they just
eliminate Saturday deliveries, they're a nuisance anyway!
Despite all of this, I haven't given up on another big trip
while I still have the health. Getting ripped off by that unqualified repairman
for $5,500 sure set me back! That was money down a rat hole and the work must
be redone at a higher price! Still, I want something to look forward to in my
old age besides illness and death. I'm determined that my last exotic trip
won't be the final one.
On the other hand, I've already enjoyed multiple trips of a
lifetime.
I always knew that someday I would visit Paris, Rome,
London, and all the major European capitals. But I never imagined that I would travel
behind the Iron Curtain and see Russia & the Crimean up close. Or sail from
the Spanish Costa del Sol past the Rock of Gibraltar to Tangier & spend a
week in North Africa; or kiss the Blarney Stone; or climb ancient ruins at Tikal
in the jungles of Guatemala; or go snorkeling in the Galapagos Islands; or ride
an elephant thru a stream and mountain jungle in Thailand. Or ever set foot in
Dubai even if it was just to change planes. But I've done all of those things
and many, many, many more!
However, I long to make new memories in other faraway
places!
But even if I don't, I'm grateful for everything I have
right now. I am proud that I didn't allow age to turn me into an overweight frump.
And I rock gray hair the way few women can! -- Go ahead and hate me, see if I
care! I'm always good to myself because others are not.
I really have no right to feel sorry for myself! I should be
downright ashamed in doing so. I've been indeed blessed in all sorts of ways!
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