FORGET THE BUCKET LIST

 

They say the best things in life are free. If that's true, I've either had them already or else don't want them. All of my bucket list activities cost the kind of money I don't have. So they are destined to remain fantasies and my list is endless. I'm sure plenty of others can relate to this!

However when I was younger I did many of the things I always wanted to do along with ones I'd never imagined; such as touring Russia, Ukraine, & the Crimean, conquering my fear of public speaking, and getting arrested. The last one I'm not proud of. 

I recently turned 73, I've lived one year longer than my mother. On both sides of my family we tend to die between the ages of 80 - 85. My father at age 80 was young looking, handsome, and active; but that changed almost overnight.

Despite his healthy lifestyle he was stricken with a heart attack that required a triple bypass, followed by a stroke and finally terminal cancer. He died at 85 the same age as his chain smoking father.

The longest survivor by far was my Aunt M who never had to deal with a problem her entire life according to her sons and she lived to be a hundred!

My life seems more full of problems than anything else! It's a sobering thought to realize that I may indeed be dead in about ten years! At my current age I would love to be traveling the world again instead of paying doctors and dentists! My time and health is quickly running out.

Recently I visited a friend whom I hadn't seen in months although we've spoken many times on the phone. She is seven years my senior. I was shocked by how old and feeble she had become. It seemed to have occurred suddenly as if an evil fairy struck her with the decrepit stick!

This left me unnerved and frightened. My turn is just around the corner! She has healthcare and I do not. I may not even make it to her age!

Years back I thought expatriating to a developing country was the answer. I had it narrowed down to Ecuador or Thailand. This was during the previous decade when it was easier to save up for exploratory trips.

Both of these countries proved TOO Third World for me! Affordable healthcare was there but the quality of life was far lacking.

And during the years since both countries have experienced changes that would have forced me to move! Plus neither handled the pandemic well. I'd probably be dead now had I expatriated.

Also I considered Mexico. Sadly it has become way too violent! Nothing as it used to be during the 1970's when I vacationed there.

If I'm ever stricken with terminal cancer as my parents, I won't fight it prolonging the agony. Instead I'd take whatever money I have left buy a first class ticket and start traveling to as many distant places as possible and die in a faraway land. I want to be cremated and scattered wherever I happen to end up.

Of course I might have a heart attack or stroke and end up dying in my recliner. That would be OK too. This is the house where I recaptured my happiness and one I love.

More than once the world I knew was yanked out from under me. Each day now I feel the ground shifting beneath my feet. Guess I do have a bucket list after all! This one involves hanging onto what is mine for as long as I can. Everything is temporary, even life itself.