SCARFACE

 

I'll admit to being a vain woman! I'm a firm believer in putting your best face out there. I admire and cheer on people who take pride in their appearance. I've even co-authored a healthy lifestyle beauty manual for women on a fixed income.

This is why being informed by a doctor that I'd be left with a facial scar after surgery came as unsettling news! The location on my face (above the upper corner on the right side of my lip & into the crease on my cheek) was a factor. It's where the skin gets stretched regularly.

I am not about to stop eating, talking, smiling, or laughing; although I've been doing a lot less of the latter two. Also I am not going to cut back on brushing or flossing my teeth.

The dermatologist called this "a significant wound". Not only would I have a scar but it would lift the corner of my mouth. I'd look as if I'd had a stroke! He immediately sent me to a plastic surgeon.

The first thing the nurse said when the plastic surgeon entered the room was, "Look at her skin! Can you believe she's actually 70!"

Yes, thanks to decades of sunscreen, broad brim hats, and umbrellas my skin does appear amazingly youthful for a 70 year old! My friend Marie told me, "I can understand why you're so upset; outside of the cancer your skin is perfect!"

Yeah, and I am pissed as hell because for decades I was careful and did everything right!

The plastic surgeon stated that stitches wouldn't do, I required a skin graft. The scar would be relocated to another area of my face.

 I had no idea how deep the wound was until I put my finger into it to apply ointment. This was a shock! It's a bloody pit in my face.

I was instructed to keep it moist. My wound must never be allowed to form a scab, or the scar will be much worse!

The plastic surgeon stated I could wait until it healed for the skin graft. I told him the dermatologist said the exact opposite.

"You're a pretty lady," he replied, "and he didn't want to risk messing up your face, but repairing a scar can be done anytime."

This was welcome news! I had just paid my whopping property taxes and the skin cancer surgery, plus the office visits, biopsy, & pathologist cost were all adding up! Despite my age, I'm ineligible for social security or Medicare. (Long story!) If I ever have a heart attack, stroke, or even a serious bout with cancer I'd better just plan on dying!

During my teens and twenties I had scars on various parts of my body for different reasons. By the time I was 50 barely a trace of them remained. However I no longer have the luxury of time.

But I want to see how the scar actually looks after everything heals. I may just decide to live with it. It will be a year or more before I know for sure. In the meantime, for selfish reasons I hope people will continue to wear masks for a long time to come.