SOME LIKE IT COOL

The only place I’ve ever been that was hotter than Florida in the summer was Acapulco, Mexico. I was there twice and both times in late fall. Yet the heat was almost unbearable! And just hours before I was up in the Sierra Madres where everyone was wearing sweaters. It was a silver mining town called Taxco. I would have preferred more time there and less on the beach. I grew up on Florida’s Treasure Coast; a beach is nothing extraordinary to me.

This year I was late putting winter into hibernation. I didn’t start cleaning and packing away all my blankets and long-sleeved clothes until just recently. I was still clinging to that foolish hope we’d get one last cool spell before the summer heat set in. While others were shivering up north, Florida was miserably mild this past winter.

I’ve always felt that Florida was a wrong fit for me. I don’t want ice and snow, but I don’t like sweating 8 months of the year either! I need a little bite in the air to be comfortable.

Many here claim to LOVE the heat. “It’s impossible to get too hot for me!” they bellow. -- I wonder how they’d enjoy Hell. In my humble opinion, it’s the perfect spot for them.

I’m a fair-skinned Nordic type who doesn’t have much tolerance for sun and heat. Plus I sweat like a horse! During July & August, sunscreen streaks down my face in long rivulets just walking across a parking lot from my car to the supermarket or mall. I can’t wait to get into the air-conditioning!

I’ve always said June is the only good summer month; technically it’s still spring until the 21st. After that comes the sweltering heat with its hellish humidity, followed by hurricane anxiety. Usually in June, at least the nights and mornings are still comfortable.

About 5 or 6 years ago, on the tail end of June, the first miserably hot morning of summer arrived. This was on a Saturday during my movie-hopping period. I heard the air-conditioner kick-on before I left around 10:00 AM for a fun-filled day. I managed to watch 3 movies on 1 ticket and didn’t get home until around 5:30 PM.

As I stepped from my garage into my house, I found myself inside a sweat box!!! I couldn’t understand, because I heard the A.C. running. In a panic, I phoned a repairman. Because the following day was Sunday, he wanted almost double to fix it.

I thought back to my childhood. We lived in 2 houses that didn’t even have air-conditioning. And these were nice homes, too! Plus none of our friend’s homes had A.C. either! This seems unthinkable now. We just sweltered and suffered. Nor did our homes have over-head fans, just the mobile kind.

My family didn’t live in an air-conditioned home until we bought our house on the river in 1960. However, my father refused to turn it on until almost the end of July due to the cost. And this was when he had his high-paying job!

The old air-conditioners were costly because they ran constantly. I miss them! The new energy efficient ones alternately sweat and freeze you. Throughout the day I’m always pulling off clothes and putting them back on. Of course my A.C. is set high to save money. Mostly I keep my blinds shut and walk around nude.

OK , so to save a few bucks, I told the repairman I’d stick it out until Monday. Naturally, the rest of the weekend was horrid! That night, and the next, it was too hot to sleep in my bed. I slept on the floor between the over-head fan and my large open bedroom window. There was a bit of a breeze. Still, it was miserable. I had not slept on a floor since the last hurricane.

Time seems to zoom-by faster each year as I grow older. Another summer has arrived all too soon. Knock-on-wood that my A.C. will run problem-free throughout the days ahead, also that El Nino keeps this hurricane season an uneventful one.