SNIPPY SUB-STANDARD SERVICE

The months following Christmas are the best time to receive catalogues in the mail! All the winter merchandise goes on sale for vastly reduced prices.

Perusing through an ALLOY catalogue I spied a couple cute, light-weight sweaters perfect for our Florida winters. And they were on sale at a price I could not pass up.

Unfortunately, after my experience with the person at the other end of the line, I think the catalogue should be re-named ANNOY.

The sizes were small, medium, & large. I told the gal I was a size 8, and asked how the sizes ran. Give me some idea.

"I just told you!" she replied with a tone of exasperation, "small, medium, or large!"

I explained that in some catalogues a size 8 was a small and in others a medium.

"We just have small, medium, & large. And I need a size!" she said with impatience.

"I'll guess medium," I told her. "But if I'm wrong, I can always return it, right?"

She didn't answer. Suddenly it dawned on me that I'd be on the hook for postage if I had to send it back. I asked to speak to a supervisor.

"They'll just tell you the exact thing!'' she retorted raising her voice. From her tone, I could tell she thought I was too stupid to live.

I told her to cancel the order. I decided I could live without the sweaters. The least that twit could have done was direct me to a size chart. I can't imagine anyone selling clothes not having one!

I've purchased merchandise from ALLOY before without problems. And I will probably buy from them again unless I get another ignoramus with an attitude! Whenever someone is separating me from my money I expect to be treated with respect! But that's becoming a quaint concept nowadays.

When making purchases, I prefer to call using 800 numbers rather than the Internet. I've only bought a handful of items online and half were negative experiences.

One sent the wrong color! Their return policy was the most customer unfriendly I've ever encountered! I needed their permission to return it. Plus they would not accept anything that had been removed from the plastic. My item was intact. However, I was required to pay not only return postage, but a $10 restocking fee as well.

I told them I'd keep the damn unflattering color! But I'd never purchase anything from them ever again! -- And I would have been a frequent customer. Because I liked their cute, funky styles. Also I would have recommended them to other people. It was their loss!!!

After my last Internet purchase, my credit card co. phoned about a mysterious charge for $1 that I did not make. They said it was a red flag and suggested I get a new card and number. I'm grateful they spotted it!

Soon after, I began getting those infamous emails from strangers in foreign lands eager to give me their millions for a small upfront fee.

Egads, making a purchase these days can involve not just rudeness, but risk! BUYER BEWARE is more true than ever.